SPRINGS STORIES

Joshua & Erin Dodson

Jesus is faithful, no one is too far gone, and no situation is beyond hope and reconciliation.

Joshua
“Growing up, I had no exposure to “religion” whatsoever and lived in an unstable and confusing environment. My father was a criminal and an addict who would die from complications from drug use when I was young. My mother did her best but did not know how to create a safe or stable home. We grew up being passed around family all over Texas, and an aunt gave me my first Bible at 8 or 9 years old.

“It was around this age that I had my first experience with sexual abuse, abuse that I wouldn’t share for another 20 years. When I was 12, my mom was finally dating someone I liked, but right as I began to feel comfortable with him as a father figure, my mom discovered he had been unfaithful and kicked him out. I was devastated. The abandonment and vulnerability I felt were deep-seated, and I believe that’s when my anger and rebellion took a hard turn.

“I sought to escape the pain in my life and fill the void in my heart with drugs, drinking, and sex. When marijuana got old, I moved on to harder and harder drugs. There weren’t 5 minutes in the day that I wasn’t under the influence. After running away several times, my mother had enough and put me into inpatient rehab. At first, I was so dazed that I didn’t even understand where I was. But after a while, being clear-headed, I thrived there – so much so that they asked me to be part of the leadership team. It was awesome, and it was there that the Lord started revealing himself to me. I didn’t understand who He was exactly, but it was there that I first recognized a need for a higher power. This relief was short-lived after I was kicked out in response to having an inappropriate relationship with someone there. In my pain and anger, I went running back to the only thing I knew – euphoria and darkness. I jumped back into sex, drugs, and alcohol even more intensely than before. I had pretty much accepted that I was going to die, and I wanted to party as much as I could before that. I had no hope, and sobriety seemed impossible.

“But in 2001, I met a woman who would become the love of my life. When I met Erin, there was something different. I felt like in order to capture this woman’s heart, I needed to clean up. So, after praying earnestly for the first time in my life, I quit drugs cold turkey against all odds–and pursued her, but continued to drink heavily. We got married in 2002 because she was pregnant. My life was still broken. I was a functioning alcoholic and ultimately developed a new addiction to painkillers. I absolutely checked out of our family of four, and all I desired was to drink, take pills, and play video games. I left all the parenting to Erin while I once again was chasing euphoria and isolation. I was a completely absent father.”

Erin
“From childhood, my mother took my brother and me to church. I struggled with chronic illness as a child and believed from a young age that I was broken and not valuable. My initial faith and baptism were actually based on a fear of dying. I believed in God but didn’t know Him.
 
“My teenage years were marred by a search for acceptance in harmful places–depression, self-harm, substance abuse, and sexual relationships. In my junior year of high school, I was in an incredibly destructive relationship and found myself navigating an unplanned pregnancy. In my fear, I attempted to end the pregnancy myself and walked through a miscarriage. Though church continued to be a part of my life, I was lost and living in rebellion, unwilling and unable to change.

“A couple of years after high school, I met and married Joshua after finding out we were pregnant. Our marriage was troubled from the start by his addictions. After the birth of our second child, I knew something needed to change, and I got plugged into a local church and connected with a community group. This group loved and cared for me in a way I had never experienced, with some of the men even pursuing Joshua. I felt hope for the first time in a long time. Although Joshua accepted Christ and experienced a brief freedom from his addictions, we were not equipped or ready to handle things on our own, and after a few years, Joshua returned to his destructive habits. Though I had lost a lot of hope in our marriage, I had found hope for the first time in the church and knew I needed to keep sharing my story.”

Ours
“6 years would go by before we saw hope together. Our marriage and family were marked by unfaithfulness, past hurts, addictions, emotional abuse, and more. On the verge of divorce, for “real” this time,  a new church family stepped in and offered life-changing support and care. Though we were both weary and even struggling with bitterness towards the “church,” we leaned into their guidance, and both attended re:generation, the recovery ministry.  

“The Springs guided us towards health for the first time in our family history. They facilitated space for healing from bitterness, abandonment, past abuse, and deeply broken trust. They taught us how to receive, ask for, and extend forgiveness. They connected us with men and women who we could identify with and shared in different aspects of our story. Some of these relationships were absolutely transformational for Joshua. As we learned to put our full trust in God, we began to move back towards one another.  

“There is no longer isolation in our family. The darkness that once marked us was being flushed out with light. We were actually known and loved, pursued and encouraged, challenged and spurred on. Change for our family at one point seemed impossible, but we have found that Jesus is faithful, no one is too far gone, and no situation is beyond hope and reconciliation. Our family is forever changed because of the faithfulness of God and the hands and feet of Jesus we have experienced here at the Springs.”